"But everything was beautiful at the ballet"

So Wednesday! This meant lots of new's. The first is a new hair cut! I got bangs. I was really nervous they wouldn't turn out right, but I put pictures up on facebook and I got so much support! And it's def. something new and exciting! I also bought a ton of bobby pins, hair pins, and some head bands to assist with the transition to the banged life. Today was my first ballet class! I was ridiculously excited. So quick, but embarrassing story time! So the official dress code for ballet is pink tights, black leo, a wrap skirt, and hair in a bun. However, my class is very small and very unofficial. The class is four students and one is an old woman. Like she's younger than my parents, but not by much. Any way, I had my sweatpants on and my wrap skirt in bag when I realize that the rest of the class is in yoga pants...luckily I had been overly cautious and had a pair of soffee shorts in my bag. Thank goodness I pack obsessively! So I not so stealthily pulled off my sweats and slid my shorts over the leo. On the plus side my legs looked pretty darn nice in my ballet pink tights. Class went well too. I picked things up pretty quickly, hopefully I can switch into a more intense class eventually. And of course it felt amazing! Barre stretches are kind of the best thing ever! <3 <3 <3 Also looking to the future, I got a job offer today! Well it's from the music studio I interned with over the summer so I probs won't get paid, but my boss asked if I would want to assistant direct a show! The show is Into the Woods (aka my 2nd favorite Sondheim show!!!) So that would be in the spring. Even farther in the future, I just need to enter a few more details to my common app and then I'll be ready to hit submit. I'll have done my EA Dickinson app and my app for Susquehanna (my safety, but it's rolling) done! So scary how fast this is moving!
But tomorrow I close a chapter of my life. Tomorrow is Marching Band awards. Nobody's really ready gift wise. I still need to pick up the sweatshirts and buy the stuffed animals. Then for the directors we're making a video as seniors. I feel bad nobody's really trying. My grade is so lazy about band stuff. I also still need to write my speech ahhh!
School is pretty crazy right now. I'm trying to balance my lack of desire to work and my desire for good grades. It's pretty rough. That's why I do things like blog to procrastinate my academic life. And that's a skill I can take right to college!

Clouds begin to part

I've talked myself off the cliff! Not that I was ever really on the cliff I'm too bloody optimistic for that kind of depression. :D Yes, but also things are turning around for the better. I start ballet tomorrow! I'm kind of ridiculously excited, like it's embarrassing. I've been wearing my ballet shoes around my house to break them in. I'm so excited. Also my mom was able to schedule my hair appointment for tomorrow. Tomorrow I'm getting bangs! I'm very nervous, but also very excited for a fresh new cut. Also I shot for photo...again. But this time my negatives came out. Some of them look very promising. Photography really is an incredibly emotional art form. It drives me crazy! Thursday is band awards, also very exciting. I can't wait to dress up all pretty, eat some yummy food, and give an emotional speech. Oooh also Mr. Goldstein read my college essays and yesterday he told me they were fantastic. He can be kind of hard to please so it meant a lot. Just wanted to throw in a quick update about my life, not really much else. 

What's on my mind

So a couple things on my mind.
The first is how friendships fade. I've been analyzing my social circle a lot lately. One friend particularly stands out. Freshman year we were best friends. Like we hung out just us all the time. We were sooo close. But like I barely talk to her anymore. She tries to hang out with all these new people. And something pretty important happened to me and I still haven't told her about it. I feel like she'd be all weird or something. And since this is big news and I didn't tell her I'm pretty sure we're not best friends any more. I mean this is the sorta thing you're supposed to tell your best friend, the sorta thing you're supposed to want to tell you're best friend. And I know I'm being pretty vague about this news but it's kinda too personal/ confusing to post on the good ol' internet. And like just people have changed so much recently. Like people are drinking and smoking who were completely sober last year. It's strange to see things move so fast. As for me? I guess I've changed. I'm in a weird phase where I'm not totally sure who I am. Like all my self definitions seem off. A lot of the times I don't know how I feel. Like I'm not changing important value systems and completely changing who I am. Some things are just a bid cloudier than they should be. But at the same time I kind of like this ambiguity. I am leaving practically everything behind once I graduate high school so maybe a little wiggle room on "who I am" will be good. This is ridiculously introspective and probs no one cares so I'm going to move on now.
The second thing on my mind is my hatred for photography. Me and photo have an on again off again relationship and right now we are very, very off. Today I spent 2 hours walking around Summit taking pictures of various doors. I was having a lovely time, the weather was beautiful, I was listening to The Black Keys (their music is very inspiring for being artsy and cool), and some of my shots were very nice. Then of course my film didn't roll correctly and when I opened my camera of course instead of being neatly bundled away all my film was exposed to light. This means I have my 5th roll of film to look forward to. Last project I only had to shoot one roll. This is ridiculous. When I exposed my film I just started swearing. Photography is so emotional. Like the entire process just totally screws with you. Like when you do something right it feels really good. But the challenging bits suck!
Well I'm ahead of the blogging game so I don't have much else to talk about. Hopefully this week will be better than the last. Always what I hope for!

Turkey Day with the Turkey

Thanksgiving! My Thanksgiving Eve was pretty magical. I went to Tito's Burritos with some lovely young women. We started singing a Christmas carol and some stranger came and joined us; it was a magical moment. Then Sonya's mom was being mad at her, poor thing. So I picked up Greased Lightening (my dad's Toyota Camry lolz) I drove Nicole and Courtney to the Friendly's parking lot. We loitered for a very long time. During that time we prank called my good friend Jonathan. I pretended to be a live turkey salesgirl selling him a turkey to slaughter named Hank Sgiving named Cheryl Cheryl Campbell (So nice they named her twice...her parents weren't very creative). At one point I was shouting about Billy Mays... Good times. Then Thomas, Gabe, and, Brian showed up and we went to Dunkin' for 10:00 free donuts. It was cool hanging out with the boys I usually don't hang out with them. The next day was THANKSGIVING! I woke up ridiculously early for marching band. It was my  last band show ever! Gosh, can't believe it's over :(. At the end of the football game Jon slapped Brian! What a happy Slapsgiving! As slap bet commissioner I gave a countdown for the slap. It was great, highlight of my day! The slap bet was made over a math test haha they're such geeks, but they're mine so it's okay. I also got to see some NPHSers who had returned from college. Then I came home ate kielbasa (mmm...mamma Nat makes it for all holidays. My Ukrainian heritage is delicious!), took a shower, and a nap! When I woke up Aunt Ellen, Uncle Steve, and my cousin Matthew were at my house. Yep I was napping when they arrived...sorry not sorry. We had a lovely, traditional, American Thanksgiving. My favorite are the sweet potatoes! I actually watched football on the television! I know impressive for me. Everyone was really upset when the dolphins lost (I pretended to care about football...well, I do sorta care about football). Then my cousin Katherine and her boyfriend came. I met him last year, he's really nice I'd be happy if they got engaged. That's probably a long way off, but I'm overly romantic. After everyone left, I watched Bridesmaids. It was very funny, I love Kristen Wiig. Friday meant the Holiday Walk. I love the Holiday Walk! And since 'm a senior I got to carry an extremely large candy cane. It was officially my last band activity. CRAZY! Then we got our traditional Santa picture in town! I love Christmas! We went to the diner after that. Oh, I should clarify "we" means me, Sonya, Nicole, Emma, MarkyMark, Victor, and Abs. After that we went to Abby's house for left over desserts and rock band. Dan joined us at this point. He's done with all his college apps lucky jerk! Today, was very busy for me! I took my shoes to a shoe repair place. Why? Because someone spilled their stupid soup in a school hallway and didn't even have the courtesy to clean up their stupid mess! So not only did I embarrass myself (I was walking with Brian and I slipped and fell. Surprisingly though he didn't laugh he actually offered to help me up like a semigentleman Surprise cause he's not always the nicest. Probs the nicest moment we had together...anyway) so I got my boot's covered in someone else's stupid soup. My beautiful suede boots! I'm still upset obviously. I went to Brunch with Emma, Sam, and Cara Esposito. We're not a first name basis yet, but she's nice. Then Emma and I went to the mall to find dresses for band awards. I found a pretty dress, I also got a new top, a slouchy knit hat! and some makeup. Successful day. Very successful day. Also How I Met Your Mother is now instantly streamed on Netflix, needless to say I've watched WAY too many episodes today! Just kidding no such thing as too much HIMYM. Challenge Accepted! 

crazy and hazy

Congratulate me. Okay, now I'll tell you why. I recorded my college CD yesterday! The studio was really professional, and it was crazy hearing myself like that. The recorder has this really nice reverb that makes it sound like I was singing in a huge concert it's all echoey and ringy. I was also really picky listening, but that's natural. I'm so relieved that it's done. First thing I did was go to Starbucks for my first coffee of the entire week. (I gave up coffee for vocal health) Then I had coffee again later so I totally screwed up my sleep schedule cause my body was shocked by the caffeine, and I had some stuff on my mind. I would like to take this time to acknowledge my best friend Sonya. Really, she's been a fantastic friend all these years (I mean c'mon she puts up with me...kid deserves a medal!) And I know she reads my blog more than anyone (my biggest fan!). Seriously though she's there when it counts! Love you girl! I'm obviously referring to the fact she watched HSM China with me...duh! I'm also very excited because I made a new playlist to listen to while driving :D I was getting tired of my other stuff. Well I gotta go eat dindin. Hopefully it's something yummy!

a beautiful ending

So exciting things that happen in my life! Last Thursday I was in upstate New York visiting colleges! I was at Hamilton and Colgate (these schools probably won't accept me). Then Friday I was at F&M for my interview. Seriously all of these schools tried bribing me with food! Delicious :D. None of this matters because I picked my top choice school. And it's... just kidding maybe I' being superstitious but I feel like blogging about the school and how badly I want to be accepted will be bad luck! Yes but I found out they just added a film and media studies major when all my other schools only offer it as a minor. And since I want to write beautiful scripts a major would in fact be more helpful. Then Saturday we had football and then I had to babysit. The football game was senior farewell.I proudly wore my carnation and left my jazz shoes on the track symbolizing leaving band. It was really weird because it seems like no time has passed since I said goodbye to "Seniors '09". Babysitting was also fine. The kids were really shy, but they told their mom they liked me the next day so that's good.  The parents came home an hour later than they said they were going to and I was so tired! I napped on their couch a little. I got there 7:30 and the kids went to bed at 9:00 so I had plenty of free time. It was my first time babysitting for this family. First off, their house was insanely beautiful. Apparently they moved out for a while because they had a ton of work done on it. But every detail was pretty much perfect. Second, they were total lushes! Seriously they have a separate refrigerator for alcohol, a wine cellar in the basement, and my favorite, an open bottle of vodka in the freezer. Seriously! Good thing I'm not the drinking type! Then Sunday was my last band competition ever! I was emotionally a total mess. I think I cried like 7 times! The first was before I was even dressed. Mr. N (my band director) gave me flowers because I'm captain and I just lost it... I knew it would be a long day. But we won! National Champions! (really we beat 5 other bands but still!!!) I was so proud. I'm also incredibly sad it's over. We still have football games, but it's not the same! Sunday I make my college CD which I'm pretty nervous about. I hope it sounds really good! I'm singing Per Non Pe Nar, Alma del Corre, No One Is Alone (Into the Woods), and I Could Write a Book (Pal Joey). Today senior citizens visited our school. I sang People Will Say We're in Love from Oklahoma with James. It was very cute and funny. I could tell the senior citizens really enjoyed it :). Tomorrow I'm going to see James in RENT and Saturday I'm going to see The Miracle Worker which will be interesting. I'm also going to watch High School Musical: China with Sonya and some other people. It's gonna be amazing! Peace out girl scouts...

SO HAPPY :D

And in first place with a score of 96.6 winning the captions in best visual effect, best overall effect, and best color guard... New Providence High School! These are the words I heard yesterday when we became group 6A State champs! Like honest one of the happiest moments in my life. It made all the hard work I've done this season worth it. Like this really makes my senior year special.I'm so proud of my band and my guard <3
After a morning of taking the SATs (one last time please another hundred points) nothing like kicking butt at marching band to make you happy. Unfortunately postband I had to babysit. Which was good because I made some bank and watched a movie about guinea pigs but sad cause I'd rather go to the diner.
On the down side I think I'm getting sick :O which is simply not an option until after the 20th so c'mon white blood cells do work! I'm trying to take lots of vitamin C and fluids and sleep and I even did a sinus rinse today!
Also I'm still trying to decide on the last song for my college CD I borrowed some sheet music, but I'm deciding between like 6 songs GAHHHHHH so stressful!!!
What's not stressful is buying socks. Today I bought some crazy socks for senior farewell with Nicole and Sonya. It's the one day of our band careers that we can wear whatever socks we want! But this weekend is senior farewell and our last band competition. I'm going to cry so much. I cried a little at Saturday's competition. Well, not really cried but teared a little. Sunday I'm just going to be a complete mess!!! I can't believe band is almost over :(

why my life sucks: a narrative on snow

One day without power, fine okay it happens. Whatever. Now going on 4, I want to die! First of my grievances. Now is not! The time for snow! Snow in October is unacceptable. So Sunday my parents decided rather than stay in our freezing cold house that doesn't even have hot water we would flee to a hotel. Which sucks for me because I feel like a caged bird (I can't even sing due to lack of sound proofing in hotels). Serious cabin fever syndrome. So I try to do homework/ college apps and fail because I'm so miserable. Yesterday, I ventured back to New Prov into the cold to hang out with Nicole and Christina just because I'm so bored here. Like seriously I've never missed my house so badly. We've had off from school 2 days which means no more snow days...yes, good bye actual weeks off! Also my town moved Halloween to Friday. Like nbd it's just a holiday we can just move that around if we want. But yep 90% of New Prov is out of power. And we may not get power back until Thursday. I'm not going to last that long in captivity. 2 more days not gonna happen. I'll stage a break out. And I know I shouldn't complain. I do have internet and lights and heat. And last time we checked no fallen trees damaged our house, but oh my gosh how many times can I cycle through facebook, email, twitter, hulu, youtube, online shopping, etc. before I need real companionship. HELP!!!